From time to time I'll share with you some of their best questions and my best attempt at a reply. I won't reveal who wrote them because I want the students to feel confident writing whatever they wish on those pages. But these are real questions, asked by real students in our church. You might be surprised how much they reflect your own!
This question regards last Sunday's sermon on love and the Law:
Though we know we can't always keep the Law, should we feel guilty every time?
Click through below to hear the reply...
As with many God things, there's a "yes" and a "no" to this.
We get in trouble when we forget our guilt entirely. As soon as we think we're not guilty of anything--or at least not guilty of anything serious--we start believing we're good...perfect, even. This has a few bad effects.
First, if we're good on our own we don't need God and certainly don't need Jesus dying for us on the cross. The more we rely on our own goodness the less we rely on God. Relying on God less is not smart, eh?
Second, we start building our lives on the foundation of our own goodness. We base our beliefs on being good, make decisions based on it. Once those beliefs and decisions get built on top of the idea that we are good, you can't remove the foundation without toppling the whole building. Therefore we have a harder and harder time admitting that we're not good, even in small ways. We can't or we'd have to re-examine and maybe change everything we've built in our lives. Therefore we have a harder and harder time adjusting and hearing people who think differently than we do, especially if that difference calls our own goodness into question. Eventually we get to the point where everybody has to think we're perfect or we can't stand to be around them. That makes it hard to grow or have meaningful relationships.
Third, assuming our own perfection makes it harder to tolerate what we perceive as imperfections in others. We get less tolerant of other people's mistakes and shortcomings. We get less tolerant of other people being different from us. We only function well when everything and everyone around us is perfect by our definition. This also makes meaningful relationships hard because neither life nor other people are ever really perfect.
For all these reasons it's good to have a sense of our own imperfection. This means admitting our own shortcomings and, yes, guilt. This is why every Sunday we begin worship with confession, saying, "I am guilty. I have fallen short. I did not keep the Law perfectly, nor did I love God or my neighbor enough." This eliminates the idea that we are perfect and forces us to rely on God instead of ourselves. It also puts us all--including your pastor--in the same boat. None of us can stand above the other and say, "I am perfect and you are not." We remember to tolerate each other's shortcomings as they tolerate ours. That allows us to be together, to worship together, to do good things together as a church, and to welcome new people to join in without worrying about who is more right or wrong than anybody else.
So yes, we should always carry with us the realization that we have fallen short of the law and are guilty.
But after our confession each Sunday we hear the words, "God forgives you all your sins." We need to take this just as seriously as our guilt. We know we have fallen short. God knows we have fallen short. He'd be perfectly within his rights to punish us or call us to account for our mistakes. Instead of doing that he says, "I forgive you. We're not going to let those mistakes define our relationship or get in the way of all the good we're going to do together." Even though we know we are guilty, we should listen to and follow God when he says this. We cannot let that guilt get in the way of being the beautiful, wonderful, life-giving people he means us to be. Nor should we let other people's guilt make us see them as anything but God's children, in need of forgiveness (just like we are) and beautiful because of his forgiveness (just like we are).
In practical terms the trick is to remember our guilt without dwelling on our guilt. We should remember our guilt every time we're tempted to think of ourselves as perfect, every time we consider ourselves "too good" for someone or something, every time we think we can live life just fine on our own and we don't need God for anything. But when we look in the mirror we should see an amazing Child of God who is blessed to overcome mistakes and do wonderful things. We should not look in the mirror and see a big mess of guilt but a big bunch of blessings and wonder bursting at the seams. We should treat ourselves like God's forgiven people and treat others that way as well. And when it's time to do good for someone or for the world we shouldn't be sitting there like Eeyore saying, "Woe is me...I am guilty." Instead we should be bouncing like Tigger saying, "I'm forgiven! I'm forgiven! Let me do it! Let me do it!"
Sometimes it's more important to remember our guilt, sometimes to remember the forgiveness. It'll depend on the situation. But you always have to carry both along because you never know which one you'll need in a given situation.
--Pastor Dave (pastordave@geneseelutheranparish.org)
P.S. I'm still working on figuring out that e-mail address. If you've written me at it, be patient. A reply is coming!
