More Homespun Wisdom

Just for fun I thought I'd do another round of random thoughts gathered from observing people, life, the world, etc.  These are just my thoughts.  Your mileage may vary.  Chime in or argue with them in the comment section if you want!

Pastor Dave's Homespun Wisdom

(in no particular order)

1.  Everybody worries.  The trick is to worry about things you can control.  That's productive.  I worry all the time about what I should say during sermons, how it came across, what I could have done differently.  Those worries make me a better preacher.  Worrying about things beyond your control makes you feel powerless and spurs you into inaction rather than positive action.  What happens, happens.  Our job is to be the best people we can through all of it.

2.  Spend money on experiences and people you'll remember more than on things you'll lose.

3.  All complaints are a mixture of something being wrong around you and something being wrong with you.  It's never just one or the other.  The litmus test to determine how much of the problem is external and how much is you is simple.  Count how many people you've complained to about this issue before taking positive action to resolve it.  The bigger the number, the more likely it is that you're the problem.

4.  If your wedding is all about you being "Princess for a Day" it indicates that you're not feeling like a princess on all the other days.  You might want to ask if you're marrying the right guy then.

4a.  Don't spend $20,000 on your wedding.  Nobody is going to remember whether you had Chicken Cordon Bleu on fine china or L'il Smokies and macaroni salad on regular plates.  Everybody loves both and nobody's going to be impressed by you trying to one-up the last wedding anyway.  Being gracious to your guests (interacting with them instead of sitting on high at a banquet table, for instance) is far more important and memorable.  Then take that other $15,000 and use it for something meaningful...or just start your nest egg with it.

5.  Handy Marriage Tip #1:  The phrase "Better to ask forgiveness than permission" does NOT apply when dealing with your wife!

6.  The validity of your point is inversely related to the volume at which it's delivered.

6a.  If you hear a preacher rail repeatedly against an evil in society he's afflicted with that evil.  Run.

7.  Nothing renews your life, relationships, and spirits more than good times with friends.

8.  Much of our unhappiness comes from our own expectations.  If it's big, grey, has a long trunk, and is eating peanuts it's an elephant.  Do not then complain that it doesn't quack and paddle around on your pond.  If you wanted a duck, you should have gotten a duck.  It's probably easier to just love the things that are cool about your elephant.

9.  Stop looking for the easy answer.  Life isn't about the right answers, it's about asking the right questions.

10.  Fun is where you find it.  Find some in each day, then share it!

--Pastor Dave (pastordave@geneseelutheranparish.org)

Ten Random Pieces of Advice

I'm not much for advice-giving, at least in the abstract.  First of all, most people aren't looking for it.  It's much better to listen and commiserate than to tell people how they should be living their lives.  Second, advice isn't a blanket endeavor.  I can sit with one person and help them discern a wise way forward in their particular situation, no problem.  But to pronounce judgment on the lives of hundreds of unrelated folks with divergent lives?  That's presumptuous.  I prefer to give people the basic tools to explore God and life--usually some combination of shaking them out of the ordinary and helping them see the potential for the extraordinary--and let them have at it.

Nevertheless, people do ask from time to time.  So today I'm stringing together ten random pieces of advice that I believe are near-universal.  The "near" is for all those people they may not fit.  This isn't the Final Word, just as close as I can get to some practical guidelines in this mystery called "life".

1.  When in doubt, go with the most loving, merciful, and grace-filled option.

2.  Put aside all those moments when you want to think you chose God through your smarts or passion or will.  You're not above him, that you should brag about choosing.  Rather focus on the fact that he chose you to be his beloved child.  Also consider the possibility that he might be choosing people around you.  Treat them accordingly.

3.  People who fear death overmuch also end up fearing life, living to protect what they think they have instead of growing what God gave them.  "Death" here doesn't have to mean just the end of our lives.  It can be translated "loss" or "pain" or "failure".  The surest sign you're too afraid:  fearing change.

4.  The best translation of "faith" is not "belief", but "trust".

5.  The only way to find strength for yourself is to give it to others.  Peace also works along these lines.  Happiness too, oddly enough.

6.  Spoiling your wife is never wasted effort.

7.  Yelling at your kids almost always is.

8.  Nothing is more futile and draining than complaining.  If something annoys you, try to find a good side to celebrate.  If you can't manage that, let it go.  Life is too short.  If you can't celebrate it or let it go, then work in a forthright and honest manner to change it or reach a compromise.  Even if your desired change doesn't come by the end of that process you should find at least one way the annoying thing makes sense to somebody...a reason it exists.  Right there you've found your thing to celebrate.  Complaining isn't productive, it's just lazy and dismissive.

9.  Gossiping takes two parties:  a speaker and a listener.  Don't participate in either end.

10.  If you can love everyone's children as much as you love your own you will be as close as you can get in this life to the Kingdom of Heaven.

--Pastor Dave (pastordave@geneseelutheranparish.org)